This Support Pause is a reflection on asking for support as a Black woman, and what reciprocity really looks like when you’ve been the one carrying the load.
Shirl reflects on a question that lingered long after it was asked: when a woman finally asks for support, does it mean more people will start asking her for things?
This episode explores asking for support as a Black woman, the fear of becoming more responsible for others, and the quiet realization that the imbalance often existed long before we ever spoke up.
This pause isn’t about fixing relationships or confronting anyone. It’s an invitation to notice where the give and the get don’t match, and to sit with what that awareness brings up.
.Got a story about what it’s cost you to be the strong one? We’re collecting real, lived stories for the Black Women Storytelling Series, and we want to hear yours.
Submit your story here → https://forms.gle/VsfFMjNjMt6eVLJp7
Come back every weekday for a new Support Pause — short, soul-soothing reflections made just for you.
About Shades of Strong®
Shades of Strong® is a space where Black women come to breathe, reflect, and reclaim strength without the struggle. Support Pauses are short, soulful reminders that you don’t have to carry it all alone. New episodes drop every weekday.
- Black Women Storytelling Series
- Schedule a 1:1 Support Session
- Get the Guide: “You Know Your Support Language™—Now What?”
- Take the Support Language™ Quiz. and learn how you actually receive support best.
- Get Support Right in Your Inbox: Gentle words, real-life reflection, and soft reminders every week
Let’s Stay Connected:
- Subscribe to Shades of Strong on Apple Podcasts or your favorite platform
- Share this episode with a sista who’s tired of being the strong one
- Leave a review if the episode spoke to your spirit — it helps more Black women find this space
- Follow Shades of Strong on Instagram for daily reflections on what it means to be suppoted
- www.shadesofstrong.com
Shirl is the creator of Support Languages™ and host of Shades of Strong® — a movement shifting the narrative from Strong Black Woman to Supported Black Woman™ through language, rest, and real support.